Half Man Half Biscuit – San Antonio Foam Party (Ukulele)

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If I had agoraphobia, and if I had claustrophobia

Am                F     C                 F     C             F
Trapped inside my porch - things would be bleak, especially midweek.

C                         F     
Your weird dreams don't impress in any way;

   C                          F
In dreams weird things are mundane and everyday

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Strange to me would be buying a loaf and coming straight home.

Am
Try and get your arse downtown next week

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I'm gonna prove once and for all to the LTA, hey hey hey.

Am
That Tim and Greg are not golden boys they are in fact automatons

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I've seen the chips and wires and the circuit boards.

     C                         F
'The reservoirs are colder and deeper than you think'

     C                                    F
Well stop, wait a minute Mr Spokesman you don't know what I think

Am            F                     C
Is your lake about - now let's see - 

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A hundred miles deep and ninety below  and is it home to sharks?

     Am                                               F     
It's gonna end up with the storming of a brothel in Palermo

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Sniffer dogs in flourescent bibs.

F                       C     F                      C       F
I've seen the chips and wires; I've seen the circuit boards

                        C     F                      C
I've seen the chips and wires; I've seen the circuit boards

                        F
This is me pleading for some civic pride;

C                       F
Use it or lose it - the Park & Ride

C                 F
Twin town said we just weren't cool

   C                    F
So now we got a suicide pact with Goole.

                      C      F
I've seen the circuit boards

                        C     F                      C
I've seen the chips and wires; I've seen the circuit boards.  (fade)