Bloodhound Gang – Three Point One Four (Guitar)

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Versions (7)

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[Intro] D A Bm A D A Bm A D A Bm A D A Bm D

[DISTORTION RIFF]
e|----------------------------------------|
B|----------------------------------------|
G|-7-7-7------------6--4-4-4------------6-|
D|-7-7-7--4--7-7-7--6--4-4-4--4--7-7-7--6-|
A|-5-5-5--4--7-7-7--4--2-2-2--4--7-7-7--4-|
E|--------2--5-5-5------------2--5-5-5----|

e|----------------------------------------|
B|----------------------------------------|
G|-7-7-7------------6--4-4-4--------------|
D|-7-7-7--4--7-7-7--6--4-4-4--4--7--------|
A|-5-5-5--4--7-7-7--4--2-2-2--4--7--------|
E|--------2--5-5-5------------2--5--------|
                               (hold)

[Verse 1]

D
My last girlfriend didn't like me

Thought she might be most likely a dyke

                A
She just didn't excite me

Lefty? Yeah, but that was all right She was hotter than the sun but she just wasn't that bright

      Bm
My mistake, she was more flaky than a leper colony

I think a wooden clothespin would have been much better company

           A
Ass like a donkey actin' funky

Gave her L, now she's a flunky So my love for her died quicker than a batch of Sea Monkeys

      D
Early bird gets the worm

Spread your legs or spread the word So what if I'm not the smartest peanut in the turd?

    A
I'm white, which goes with everything

But I can come in any color And I'm looking for the kind of girl that reminds me of my mother

         Bm
But it's hard to find a girl with a viper tattooed on her tushy

And how many girls do you know That can play the harmonica with their pussies?

         A
Like 'em easy and hot and sweet

Like a Rice Krispie Treat, gee (STOP) You know what I really want in a girl? N.C Me [Chorus]

D         A      Bm   A
I need to find a new vagina

D    A      Bm  A
Any kind of new vagina

D            A       Bm        A
It's hard to rhyme a word like vagina

D             A
Calvin Klein? Kinda

Bm    A
North Carolina

[DISTORTION RIFF] [Verse 2]

D
Women are like dog doo

Hear me through, don't interrupt It's just the older that they are, the easier they get to pick up

A
I'd fill the generation gap

Clean the cobwebs from her rafters Old hens would rather put out than be put out to the pasture

Bm
No age just ain't a gauge

I like my girls like my cheese Preferably for me, fat-free American singles only

          A
I want my next chick anorexic

The winner is the thinner Won't have to take her skinny ass out to a fancy dinner

D
Like Sizzler

She got a beef, we'll chew the fat If I forget to put the seat up I can put up with her crap

        A
Let her lash out and crack the whip

But not in bed, I don't play rough No, I can't be tied down with a girl that wants me tied up

       Bm
Just independent like NOFX

Smart like Janeane Garofalo She'd use big words to make fun of me so that I would never know

        A
Bestow upon me all her wisdom of the Dewey Decimal System, gee

(STOP) You know what I really want in a girl? N.C Me [Chorus]

D         A      Bm   A
I need to find a new vagina

D    A      Bm  A
Any kind of new vagina

D            A       Bm        A
It's hard to rhyme a word like vagina

D             A
Kevin Kline? Kinda

Bm    A
South Carolina

D A Bm A D A Bm A D A Bm A D A Bm D [OUTRO] (PLAY DISTORTION RIFF, OR USE THESE CHORDS)

D
Vagina

A
Vagina

Bm
Vagina

A
Vagina

D
Vagina

A
Vagina

Bm
Vagina

A
Vagina