Amanda Palmer – The Bed Song (Ukulele)

Bm                                Em
We are friends in a sleeping bag, splitting the heat

        G                    C              G              C
We have one filthy pillow to share and your lips are in my hair

G                      Bm 
Someone upstairs has a rat that we laughed at

    Em
And people are drinking

    G                     C           G       C
And singing Van Halen and Slayer on a ukulele tear

Bm        
Well, we found an apartment

Em
It's not much to look at

G            C
A futon on a floor

         G             C
Torn-off desktop for a door

G                       Bm
All the decor's made of milk crates and duct tape

Em
And if we have sex

         G                   C
They can hear us through the floor

             G          C
But we don't do that anymore

    G                      Em
And I lay there wondering, what is the matter?

G                   Em
Is this a matter of worse or of better?

G                        Em
You took the blanket, so I took the bedsheet

G                            Em
But I would have held you if you'd only

C
Let me

Bm
Look how quaint

                  Em
And how quiet and private

                   G                    C
Our paychecks have bought us a condo in town

         G           C
It's the nicest flat around

G                         Bm
You picked a mattress and had it delivered

    Em
And I walked upstairs

        G                         C
And the sight of it made my heart pound

      G               C
And I wrapped my arms around me

    G                        Em
And I stood there wondering, what is the matter?

G                   Em
Is this a matter of worse or of better?

G                            Em
You walked right past me and straightened the covers

G                                 Em       C
But I would still love you if you wanted a lover

        C                           Em    D/F#   G  Cdim/G#  Am      Bm       C     
But you said, 'All the money in the world won't buy a       bed so big and wide,

                           Em D/F# G     Cdim/G# Am       Bm     C                           
to guarantee that you won't acci - dentally      touch me in the night.' 

Bm
Now we're both mostly paralyzed

Em                             G             C
Don't know how long we've been lying here in fear

      G            C
Too afraid to even feel

G                     Bm
I find my glasses and you turn the light out

       Em
Roll off on your side

            G               C
Like you've rolled away for years

        G                    C
Holding back those king-size tears

    G                      Em
And I still don't ask you, what is the matter?

G                   Em
Is this a matter of worse or of better?

G                  
You take the heart failure

Em
I'll take the cancer

G                           Em            C
I've long stopped wondering why you don't answer

        Bm                   Em
You can certainly see how fulfilling a life

         G                C            G             C
From the cost and size of stone of our final resting home

G                           Bm
We got some nice ones right under a cherry tree

Em                   G           C
You and me lying the only way we know

        G                  C
Side by side and still and cold

    G                  Em
And I finally ask you, what was the matter?

G                  Em
Was it a matter of worse or of better?

G                             Em
You stretch your arms out and finally face me

        G                           
You say I would have told you

   Em         C
If you'd only asked me

   Em         C
If you'd only asked me

   Em         C
If you'd only asked me