Weird Al Yankovic – Close But No Cigar (Guitar)
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-
Versions
(3)
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Chords
These chords were made by user "Buff" and buried in a thread on the Weird Al forums. Enjoy!
[Intro]
D D Dsus4 D x 3
[Verse]
D G Jillian was her name D G She was sweeter than aspartame D G Her kisses reconfigured my DNA D G And after that I never was the same D G And I loved her even more than D G Marlon Brando loved soufflé D G She was gorgeous, she was charming, D G Yeah, she was perfect in every way D G Except she was always using the word "infer" D G When she obviously meant "imply"
[Pre-Chorus]
A And I know some guys would put up with that kinda thing G But frankly, I can't imagine why
[Chorus]
D And I told her, I said, "Hey! G Are we playing horseshoes honey? Am G No I don't think we are, D G You're close (close!) D But no cigar!"
[Verse]
D G Then I met sweet young Janet D G Prettiest thing on the planet D G Had a body hotter than a habañero D G She had lips like a ripe pomegranate D G And I was crazy like Manson about her D G She got me all choked up like Mama Cass D G She had a smile so incredibly radiant D G You had to watch it through a piece of smoked glass D G I thought: after all these years of searching around D G I've found my soulmate finally
[Pre-Chorus]
A But one day I found out she actually owned a copy G Of Joe Dirt on DVD, oh no
[Chorus]
D I said, "Hey! G Are we lobbin' hand grenades, kiddo? Am G No I don't think we are D G You're close (close!) D G Oh, so very close (close!) D Yeah baby, you're close (close!) G D So close, but no cigar!"
[Bridge]
D5 D7 Aww yeah Dsus4 Dm Aww no Asus4 Asus4 Aww yeah A A Aww no D Alright!
[Verse]
D G Julie played water polo D G She wore a ribbon on her left manolo D G She had me sweating like Nixon every time she was near D G My heart was beating like a Buddy Rich solo D G And she was everything I've dreamed of D G She moved right up to number one on my list D G And did I mention she's a world famous billionaire D G Bikini supermodel astrophysicist D G Yeah, she was so pretty she made Charlize Theron D G Look like a big fat slobbering pig
[Pre-Chorus]
A The only caveat is one of her earlobes G Was just a little tiny bit too big
[Chorus]
D I said Hey! G Are we doing government work here? Am G No I don't think we are! D G You're close! (Close!) D G So very, very close! (Close!) D Aaw, baby, you're close! (Close!) G So close! D But no cigar! G Missed it by that much! (No cigar!) D G Ah, yeah! Ah, right! (No cigar!) D G Really, really, really close! D But no cigar!