"Weird Al" Yankovic – Word Crimes (Guitar)
Key
-
Auto-scroll
Speed:
1.0x
Chords
[Intro]
G Everybody shut up! (woo!) D Everyone listen up! D Hey, hey, hey D Hey, hey, hey
C Bm Am G
[Verse 1]
G If you can't write G In the proper way G If you don't know G How to conjugate D Maybe you flunked that class D And maybe now you find D C Bm Am That people mock you online
[Verse 2]
G Okay, now here's the deal G I'll try to educate ya G Gonna familiarize G You with the nomenclature D You'll learn the definitions D Of nouns and prepositions D Literacy's your mission C Bm Am And that's why I think it's a
[Chorus]
G Good time G To learn some grammar G Now, did I stammer G Work on that grammar D You should know when D It's "less" or it's "fewer" D Like people who were D C Bm Am Never raised in a sewer G I hate these word crimes G Like "I could care less" G That means you do care G At least a little D Don't be a moron D You'd better slow down D And use the right pronoun D C Bm Am Show the world you're no clown
[Verse 2]
G Say you've got an "it" G Followed by apostrophe "s" G Now, what does that mean?
N.C.
You would not use "it's" in this case
D As a possessive D It's a contraction D What's a contraction? D C Bm Well, it's the shortening of a word or a group of words Am By omission of a sound or letter G Okay, now here are some notes G Syntax you're always mangling G No "x" in "espresso"
Your participle's danglin'
D But I don't want your drama D If you really wanna D Leave out that Oxford comma D C Bm Am G Just keep in mind that "be", "see", "are", "you"
[Chorus 2]
G Are words, not letters G Get it together G Use your spell checker D You should never D Write words using numbers D Unless you're seven
N.C.
Or your name is Prince
G I hate these word crimes G You really need a G Full-time proofreader G You dumb mouthbreather D Well, you should hire D Some cunning linguist D To help you distinguish D C Bm Am What is proper English
[Bridge]
G One thing I ask of you G Time to learn your homophones is past due G Learn to diagram a sentence, too G Always say "to whom", don't ever say "to who" D And listen up when I tell you this D I hope you never use quotation marks for emphasis D You finished second grade, I hope you can tell D C Bm Am If you're doing good or doing well G You'd better figure out the difference G Irony is not coincidence G And I thought that you'd gotten it through your skull G About what's figurative and what's literal D Oh, but just now, you said D You "literally couldn't get out of bed" D That really makes me want to literally D C Bm Am Smack a crowbar upside your stupid head
[Chorus 3]
G I read your e-mail G It's quite apparent G Your grammar's errant G You're incoherent D Saw your blog post D It's really fantastic D That was sarcastic D C Bm Am 'Cause you write like a spastic G I hate these word crimes G Your prose is dopey G Think you should only G Write in emoji D Oh, you're a lost cause D Go back to pre-school D Get out of the gene pool D C Bm Am Try your best to not drool
[Outro]
G Never mind, I give up G Really now, I give up D Hey, hey, hey D Hey, hey, hey D Go away!
D C Bm Am G