"Weird Al" Yankovic – Jerry Springer (Ukulele)

Capo 2

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Versions (3)

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A really funny spoof of the Barenaked Ladies song "One Week" from their album "Stunt". This song is from Weird Al's 1999 album, "Running With Scissors". Very easy song to play, and a lot of fun at that. Not as easy to sing, though! -Standard Tuning- -The chords are played as follows:- *All chords relative to the capo* C: 320033 Fadd9: x32033 Am7: 022033

Gadd9: xx0230
Bm4:   x20230

[Chorus]

          C                 Fadd9
It's been one week since we got to see

          C          Fadd9
Cheatin' lovers and cousins that marry

C                     Fadd9
 Five days since they had the show

          C                 Fadd9
With the hermaphrodite, the slut, and the crack ho

C                    Fadd9
 Three days since we heard the tale

  C                           Fadd9
About the guy who learned his woman was a she-male

C               Fadd9
Yesterday it occurred to me

                C                 Fadd9
That I've been watchin' a bit too much Jerry Springer

[Verse 1]

C                      Fadd9
Holy cow, d'you see it last week?

                     C                  
Well, they had this one freak

           Fadd9
Who sucker-punched his whole family

C                         Fadd9
 Do you recall when the brawl

                       C
Became a total free-for-all

                          Fadd9
And Jerry's in the middle tryin' to be the referee

C                              Fadd9
Hey, see the stripper with the implants

             C
She likes to lap dance

             Fadd9
And date the boyfriend of her mother

C                        Fadd9
 Now here come's Jerry's next guest

             C
And it's a slugfest

                  Fadd9
'Cause it's her trailer trash brother

C                        Fadd9
 Nymphomaniac is back on crack

                          C
It's like "When Animals Attack"

                       Fadd9
They all exhibit reprehensible behavior

C                                      Fadd9
 Hit 'em in the nose, tear off their clothes

                                  C
Step on their toes, that's how it goes

                          Fadd9
They get so violent they have to sign a waiver

[Bridge 1]

Am7                                Gadd9  
They're always swearin', cursin', kickin' butt, and pointin' blame

Bm4                    Fadd9
On the air? They don't care, they've got no shame

Am7                        Gadd9
There was one guy who I'm sure felt a little strange

Bm4                        Fadd9
When he found out that his wife had a sex change

Am7                      Gadd9
They have a tendency to scream and yell constantly

Bm4                     Fadd9
They have a history of ripping off their shirts

[Chorus] It's been one week since they had the fight With the Siamese twins and the transvestite Five days since that awful brawl They still haven't got the blood off the wall It's been three days since the bitter fued Between the KKK and that gay Jewish black dude Yesterday, finally dawned on me I'm spendin' way too much time on that Jerry Springer [Interlude]

C, Fadd9 (x7)
[Guy] Baby, I've been sleepin' with your sister

[Gal] Oh? Well, which one? [Guy] All of them [Gal Oh! Well, I've been sleepin' with your best friend Jake! [Guy] Yah? Well, well me too! [Gal] Oh! [Guy] And I've sleepin' with your dog Woofie! (barking) [Gal] Woofie, you b-tch! [Gal] Well, I'm also sleepin' with your pet goat! (baaahhing) [Guy] That goat doesn't love to you! [Verse 2] Once you start watchin', there's just no stoppin' Your brain shuts down, then your IQ's droppin' Jerry's the king of confrontation He's a sensation He puts the 'sin' in syndication It's totally worthless, like a bad check It's like a train wreck Don't wanna stare but you can't look away Like Sally Jesse he does talk shows But with more weirdos The ratings jumpin' higher everyday If you've seen the show, well then you know It's just as low as you can go The guests are tacky and they're lacking in their hygiene And pretty soon some ugly goon Comes in the room and then it's BOOM In the face of some unsuspecting drag queen [Bridge 2] Well it's the kind of show where people scream obscenities Yankin' hair, throwin' chairs at their hubbies "Jerry! Jerry!" Now the crowd starts their favorite chant Should I turn off my TV? I just can't I have a tendency to watch it religiously I have a history of taping each one [Chorus] It's been one week since the show about Psycho killers with problems they should work out Five days since the big surprise When some loser's wife said she's shtill dating twenty guys Three days wince he interviewed A bunch of psychic porn star midgets who were all nude Yesterday, it occurred to me That I've been watchin' a bit too much Jerry Springer Tired of wastin' my time on that Jerry Springer I've got way too much class to watch Jerry Springer Come over here and pull on my finger [End on C]