Townes Van Zandt – Talkin Karate Blues (Guitar)

C                           C7
Well, I ain't very big for twenty-one,

        F                              F7
And it seems I never could have any good clean fun,

        G                  G7                                     C     G7
Cause every time I'd go outside some great big bully would come along.

C                                   C7
He'd hit me in the face and he'd knock me to the ground

           F                     F7
And he'd start kickin' me all around,

          G                     G7             C      G7
And that ain't exactly fair, friends, that's wrong!

C                               C7
So I got me a paper the other night,

F                                      F7
And I crawled up on the sofa and I turned on the light,

      G                                G7                     C        G7
And flipped through the pages till I found the classified ads.

C                       C7
Said, "take karate from Lee Hung Chow!

      F                F7
Man, make your first appointment now!

        G         G7                    C      G7
This course is guaranteed to make you bad".

C                                  C7
Well, the next day I drove to the address,

F                          F7
a Japanese design I was really impressed,

G                         G7                  C     G7
It looked like a regular house of the rising sun.

C                         C7
I walked inside, I was all alone.

F                                 F7
I had a nervous feeling down in my bones.

G                       G7        C          G7
I was kind of sorry I'd ever even come.

C                                 C7
Then a giant Jap came through the door,

F                           F7
He must have been about seven-foot-four,

       G                   G7              C          G7
And he looked like he's prone to easy aggregation.

C                         C7
He said, "Lee Hung Chow, Ah kee dung"!

F                         F7
That's Japanese for fee fie foo fum,

G             G7                  C        G7
I tried to explain my entire situation.

C                                C7
He said, "Number one course, Yankee, self-defence,

F                           F7
Two hundred dollars and twenty-five cents"

          G                             G7                  C         G7
I said, "What's the twenty-five cents for?" And he said, "Repairs".

            C                            C7
I said, "Repairs to what?", And he said "To you".

        F                                  F7
And I thought to myself "Man, that won't do".

G                         G7                          C      G7
Felt about a half-inch tall under that old slender stare.

C           C7            F     F7 G G7 C G7
Ah, you think he was yellow!

C                                     C7
I said, "I believe I better go check another place".

          F                       F7
He said, "Ha so, Yankee don't like my race"?

        G                         G7                C    G7
I said, "Now, there's a mistake, man, and that's true!

      C                              C7
I've been for you you Japanese all along!

      F                  F7
You Japanese just can't do no wrong!

       G                        G7                       C       G7
And I thought you got a mighty dirty deal in World War II"!

C                                    C7
Well, he grabbed me by the hand and gave a heave,

       F                        F7
I figured there's a pretty good time to leave,

        G                           G7        C        G7
Before he had a chance to do me any definite harm.

        C                       C7
But my plan worked out in the end, you see,

        F              F7
Now no bully is gonna pick on me,

      G               G7           C        G7 C
Who's gonna hit a fellow with just one arm?