Tim Minchin – God (Guitar)

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Chords

[Verse 1]
C            Bb           F
I never had sex inside a church
n.c. And never had to pray on Sundays
C           Bb             F
Never gave minties to the poor
n.c. And when I'm six foot under some day
C                F
I’ll be feeling rotten

Bb
Worms eat from the outside in

C                  F
Should I take the wager?

Gm           F/A            Bb
Maybe faking it will get me in

     Gm            C/D
But faking it has always been a sin
[Chorus]
F                         Bb
And if you're gonna be a cynic, bear and grin it

            F                         Fsus2
Cos you'll never have the drugs these cats are taking

F                   Bb
If you wanna learn more from the strangers at the door

F                     Fsus2
Then I hope they are scones you're baking

F                     Bb
If you're only the beginnings of a sinner, tell me

F                                   Fsus2
Who is gonna teach you to keep your eyes dilated

F                          Bb
If you're trying to go to hell, girl, you're doing pretty well

F                                Fsus2
If you count all the times you masturbated
[Verse 2]
C              Bb               F
I know it's a breeze to just believe
n.c. And dress him up the way you like him
C             Bb                 F
Personally I think he plays the drums
n.c. And goes about in purple lycra
      C            F
With burgundy leg-warmers

Bb
Fashion never worried him

C                F
There's another option

Gm             F/A               Bb
Maybe disco threads will get you in

     Gm                 C/D
But disco threads have always been a sin
[Chorus]
F                         Bb
And if you're gonna be a cynic, bear and grin it

            F                         Fsus2
Cos you'll never have the drugs these cats are taking

F                   Bb
If you wanna learn more from the strangers at the door

F                     Fsus2
Then I hope they are scones you're baking

F                     Bb
If you're only the beginnings of a sinner, tell me

F                                   Fsus2
Who is gonna teach you to keep your eyes dilated

F                          Bb
If you're trying to go to hell, girl, you're doing pretty well

F                                Fsus2
If you count all the times you masturbated
[Bridge]
Gm             F
Far be it from me to ask you

Dm
Questions you can’t answer

     Gm              F
But tell me why you have to be

Dm
An arsehole all the time

    Gm             F
And far be it from me to throw

   Dm
A spanner at my maker

      C                 Gm                Dm
I’ll just sit back and drink your bloody wine

     Gm                 Bb/C
And leave you to things existential
[Chorus]
F                         Bb
And if you're gonna be a cynic, bear and grin it

            F                         Fsus2
Cos you'll never have the drugs these cats are taking

F                   Bb
If you wanna learn more from the strangers at the door

F                     Fsus2
Then I hope they are scones you're baking

F                     Bb
If you're only the beginnings of a sinner, tell me

F                                   Fsus2
Who is gonna teach you to keep your eyes dilated

F                          Bb
If you're trying to go to hell, girl, you're doing pretty well

F                                Fsus2
If you count all the times you masturbated
[Verse 3]
C           Bb            F
I never had sex inside a church
n.c. But I love the thought of nuns in g-strings
C             Bb                   F
And I never touched my neighbour's wife
n.c. But I spilled my share of sacred seedlings
C             F
I would be a psycho

Bb
If I tried to keep my seedlings in

C               F
I've not got a hope in hell

   Gm             F/A             Bb
If wasting sperm stops you getting in

    Gm                  C/D
But who the hell made wasting sperm a sin?
[Chorus]
F                         Bb
And if you're gonna be a cynic, bear and grin it

            F                         Fsus2
Cos you'll never have the drugs these cats are taking

F                   Bb
If you wanna learn more from the strangers at the door

F                     Fsus2
Then I hope they are scones you're baking

F                     Bb
If you're only the beginnings of a sinner, tell me

F                                   Fsus2
Who is gonna teach you to keep your eyes dilated

F                          Bb
If you're trying to go to hell, girl, you're doing pretty well

F                                Fsus2
If you count all the times you masturbated