Tim Minchin – Airport Piano (Guitar)

Dm
I wrote this song on an airport piano

Dm                                           Gm
I was the guy disturbing your journey from security

   Gm
To gate twenty-three A

Bb        C
Maybe you noticed me

Dm
I wrote this song cos I had a spare hour

Dm                                     Gm/D
I was delayed trying to get back to my babies in Sydney

      Gm                      Bb        C
And I noticed the keys so I’m writing a song

                            Dm
I don’t know why they’re so sad

                             Bb
Maybe it’s the calories they coulda had

C                      F
Filling them up with regret

                    F
And men in cafes in ski resorts

Am
Trying to connect with their sons

                          Dm
Look like they just wanna hit ‘em

                          Bb           C             Dm  Dm/C  Dm/B
I mean I’m sure that they dig ‘em underneath all the gear

                   Dm  Dm/C  Dm/B
A young man in Air Jordans

                  Bb             Am
Just left me five dollars on the piano

         C
Whattaya know

Dm
I always hated those airport pianos

Dm                                            Gm
Should be a law saying playing the theme from Beverly Hills Cop

                                   Bb  C
Will get one of your hands chopped off

Dm
I wrote this song on an airport piano

Dm
I’m out of time I just need one more little rhyme

        Gm
I gotta board that plane

        Gm
They’re calling my name

       Bb        C
So I’m writing a song

F                                 Am
Women in SUV Porsches always look miserable

                  Dm
Or is it only the Botox

                                 Bb
They stick in their face to keep their looks from slipping

        C                        F
They’re kicking the can down the road

                       F
And men in mansions on cul-de-sacs

Am
Having their midlife affairs

                   Dm
With the wife of a banker

                              Bb
While the banker is banging Bianca

    C                         Dm  Dm/C  Dm/B
But sadly they’re still gonna die

             Dm  Dm/C  Dm/B
A guy buying Subway

          Bb
Anxiously digs through his cabin bag

 Am                       C
Smiles when his wallet is found

         Dm  Dm/C  Dm/B
Pays for his six-inch

                      Dm       Dm/C
Then forgets that his bag is unzipped

       Dm/B                 Bb
So the contents of it is disgorged

               F                    C
And a jar of Viagra spills onto the ground

F                                 Am
Women in SUV Porsches always look miserable

                          Dm
And I know why they’re so sad

                                         Bb
They thought they’d be happier than they were in their Fords

                C
But now they’re bored of their Porsches

            F
And they’re looking for more, they’re out there shopping for more

          Am
And their husband’s so fat in his new Lycra shorts

          Dm
Trying to peddle his way back to ninety-four

          Bb                       C
Trying to wind back the clock to before, to before

              F
They had this boat and this house and this buy-to-let mortgage

     Am
To before they had bought all the things that they thought

      Dm
Would fill up the hole but the goal keeps receding

        Bb                            C
And his hair is receding there’s this book he’s been reading for

F
Six months but the words just swim round the pages

    Am
And god it’s been ages since they made love

        Dm                                          Bb
And the kids are on drugs with their ADHD and their anxiety

          C
And their music is shit

        F
And the time just keeps slipping away

                     Am
But I’m sitting here playing and singing and they are calling my name

         Dm
Cos your flight’s gotta go when your flight’s gotta go

      Bb                    C            F
And I wrote this song on an airport piano