The Charlie Daniels Band – Uneasy Rider 88 (Guitar)

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Me and my buddy got us a wild hair

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And figured we wanted to go somewhere

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So we loaded up in my ragtop Chevrolet

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We had a little bit of money

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And a whole lot of show

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And with Hank Jr. blaring on the radio

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We got us a tank full of gas

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And we was on our way

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We figured we'd go down to New Orleans

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We were barrelling down old 17

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When a man with a blinking red light

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Was on our tail

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He said you were doing 60 in a 45

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But I'm gonna let you go this time

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But if I catch you again

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I'm gonna slap you in the county jail

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We said thank you sir you sure been nice

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And you ain't gonna have to tell us twice

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And we were Southbound and down with the wind

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Blowing in our faces

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We kept on rolling and pretty soon

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The radio was cooking out a Haggard tune

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And we were pulling into Houston

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Checking out all them places

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I was feeling dry and I said I think

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We ought to stop and get ourselves a drink

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And old Jim said yeah 'cause we got time to kill

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We kept on rolling and I seen this spot

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And we pulled into the parking lot

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Of this place called the Cloud Nine Bar and Grill

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We walked through the door

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The lights were low they had a punk rock band

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And some orange haired feller singing about suicide

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I said Jim this ain't our kind of place

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He said well let's just have one round anyway

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So against my better judgement we walked on inside

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Went up to the bar and we sat down

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This feller walked up and said I'll buy this round

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And he sat down on the barstool next to Jim

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He looked like a girl but he talked like a guy

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He had lipstick on and mascara in his eyes

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And everybody in that place looked just about like him

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I said Jim this ain't our kind of bar

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Let's just go on out and get back in the car

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'Cause there's gonna be trouble

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Ain't no sense in taking a chance

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We was getting up getting ready to leave

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When somebody grabbed old Jim by the sleeve

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And this good looking girl was asking my buddy to dance

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I said Jim don't do it there's something missing

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There's fellers dancing and fellers kissing

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There's a feller in high heeled shoes wearing panty hose

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He said partner I just can't turn this down

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You just go over there and have one more round

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And I'll dance with the lady

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And we'll get on down the road

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So he walked away and left me alone

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But this funny looking feller kept coming on

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And he was making me mad with some of the things he said

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Then he put his hand on my knee

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I said if you don't get your paw off me

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I'm gonna locate your nose around

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The other side of your head

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He said I love it when you get that fire in your eye

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I said well partner try this on for size

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And I unloaded on him and he went out like a light

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Everybody in that place must have been his friend

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They all headed for me I said this is the end

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But where I come from we don't give up

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Without a fight

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They were screaming and yelling and scratching and clawing

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I was punching and hitting and kicking and pawing

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I was holding my own 'cause I've been in a scrap or two

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Old Jim come running up out of the blue

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And that gal he was with come running up too

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And proceeded to beat on me with a high heel shoe

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I grabbed her by the hair it came off in my hand

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And that beautiful girl was just a beautiful man

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And old Jim just got sick right there on the floor

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He dropped that dude like a shot from a gun

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Smeared his lipstick made his makeup run

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And me and old Jim started fighting our way to the door

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We lit out of there in that Chevrolet

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I put in on the floor and it stayed that way

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We were going down the highway

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Doing about a hundred and ten

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We were headed for home and we was getting nearer

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Then a red light came on the rear view mirror

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And that same blame cop was pulling us over again

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Now I'm sitting here in this county jail

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I had to call my daddy to go our bail

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But I learned me a lesson

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That I never will forget again

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I've done give up drinking I've give up bars

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And running around the country in souped up cars

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To be back where the women are women

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And the men are men