Ninja Sex Party – The Mystic Crystal (Guitar)
Key
-
Versions
(2)
Guitar Tab
Guitar
Auto-scroll
Speed:
1.0x
Chords
[Intro]
Em D/F# G E/G#
Am Am/G D/F#
B B4 G A E
B B4 G A E
B B4 G A E Oh yeah!
B B4 G A E
B B4 G A E
B B4 G A E
B B4 G A E
B B4 G A E
[Verse 1]
B B4 G A E Long ago and far away B B4 G A E In labyrinths of coral caves B B4 G A E A mystic crystal was forged in glass B B4 G A E From magic or some shit like that G A E Its powers had been used for good G A E And all men lived in brotherhood G A E/G# Until The Necromancer came B Upon his steed of bones and flame C G D His prism eyes with evil gleamed C G D He stole the crystal, then he screamed C G D "Now gods and men and all between F C Shall blow my necromancing shween!" C G D The knights and nobles of the land C G D Did all they could to stay his hand C G D Yet not a single blow was struck F C E7 F#7 Alas! For he was strong as fuck
[Interlude]
B B4 G A E
B B4 G A E
B B4 G A E Oh yeah!
B B4 G A E
[Part 2]
B B4 G A E He grabbed The Princess from her throne B B4 G A E And trapped her in the crystal stone B B4 G A E The King called in his wizards three B B4 G A E And begged them brokenheartedly G A E "Search the forests, search the seas G A E Search time and all realities G A E Two champions are what I need B To bring my daughter back to me!" C G D "Yes, my king, it shall be done" C G D The wizards said, and so begun C G D A wondrous spell that soon would find F C The greatest men in space and time C G D And that's where our story begins C G D And Danny and Brian come in C G D There is no quest from which they'd flee F C E7 D But right now they're in New Jersey
[Spoken]
N.C.
Hey, Ninja Brian, is that a mystic space portal behind you?
N.C.
Oh shit!
[Interlude]
Em D/F# G C
Am Am/G D/F#
[Verse 3]
Em D/F# G C We woke up in a foreign land Am Am/G D/F# Inside a castle, oh so grand Em D/F# G E/G# And there atop a throne of gold Am Am/G D/F# Arose The King, so gross and old Bm C "I've called you from the great beyond Bm C D To save my daughter, hot and blonde Em D/F# G E/G# You've sailed across the sky and stars Am Am/G F#7 B The gods have brought you here unharmed"
[Verse 4]
B B4 "Actually your majesty G/B You just sucked us through 26 dimensions of space and time A/B And I've gotta be completely honest with you B My arms are broken B4 And I don't know why my chest is smoking" G/B "I will heal you with my staff A/B I'm sure we'll look back on this and laugh B B4 Now go! Ride toward the sun atop these noble steeds G/B You're our spandex heroes now A/B Fulfill your destinies" B B4 And so! We turned and rode beyond the castle walls G/B A/B B B4 G/B A/B With shining codpiece armor that doth cradled our chivalrous balls
B B4 G/B A/B
[Verse 5]
G D A The sky grew dark and the road was narrow C G D But I knew we'd never be led astray G D A For Brian brought his magic arrows C G D They were blessed to light our righteous way D D4 C4 C D D4 C4 C Ah! Brian, do you think you could warn me before you're about to light our righteous way? D D4 C4 C D D4 C4 C Oh, god! Alright, fine, whatever, man Let's ride!
Em D Em D
Em D C G A7 B7
[Verse 6]
E D The trees were twisted the air was thick A C D T'was clear his domain was as evil as dick E D We passed through the gloom of the Forest of Fear A C D E Then the Pits of Disgust, and the Dark Swamp of Tears E D Then off in the distance so clear A C D The cold gray peak of Mount Nasty appeared E D Past the Fields of Annoyance, and Dragon Barf Junction A C D E D A And the treacherous Cliffs of Erectile Dysfunction C D E D Now Brian has erectile dysfunction D Only Brian, though I know, it's weird
[Verse 7]
E D We arrived at the evil one's hall A C D And dismounted our trusty steeds with resolve E D We hugged them goodbye and promised we'd never quit A C D E Then they ran straight away, for they gave not a shit E D Moonlight rose over the door A C D Lit all the jewels and the skulls on the floor E D We felt no terror as we entered the cave A7 C A7 Unless the bells of doom tolled we knew we'd be safe C D A7 We knew we'd be safe! C D We knew we'd be sa- Oh fuck...
[Verse 8]
D#m C#/E# F# Colored gemstones lit up the wall C# They formed a rainbow trail D#m Up to a giant waterfall D#m F# And there the Necromancer grinned C# The Princess stood frozen G#m Yet still so hot beside him (Damn!) D#m F# Then I heard a voice in my mind F#/A# C# T'was The Princess! C# D#m She said "Danny, your heart is kind D#m Only light can stop dark!" F# I knew what she spoke of… C# To defeat The Necromancer C# B D#m F# C# I had to use love! G#m "Stand back, Brian, I'm going to hug him!"
[Verse 9]
D#m He immediately shattered both my legs D#m And threw me across the room F# "I probably should have brought some weapons" F# I thought as I flew C# Then Ninja Brian picked me up C# Because he's a good friend B Then he used my body like a club B To beat our enemy to death Em I should have been in more pain Em Than could ever be spoken G Luckily, I felt nothing G Because my back was totes broken D Oh, the Necromancer was dead D And the crystal broke in three C I looked up into the light and saw C B7 The Princess was now free B7 Bm B "Brian, she's so beautiful! Roll me to her!"
[Verse 10]
C G D We journeyed gladly toward The King C G D His lands now green with the life of spring C G D He leapt up and wept at the sight F C Of his girl as she carried me through the night C G D "Heal this man, wizards!", he cried with delight C G D Which they did, goddamn, they keep their magic game tight C G D But sadly it was time to leave C G D So the king said "Fix Brian's E.D F C E7 A And hooray for Ninja Sex Party!"
N.C.
"Look, Ninja Brian, the Portal back home is opening!"
[Interlude]
C# D#m F#
C# D#m F#
[Verse 11]
C# Fm Bbm B Bbm Now fare thee well, it seems that our journey is at an end C# Fm Bbm B G#7 We will be here, if you should ever need our help again C# Fm Bbm B F# We walked away but stopped and turned before we took our last step C# Fm Bbm B Bbm Brian killed a guy real quick to make sure he maintained his rep C# Fm We all have our battles to fight Bbm B G# And a crystal cage to break through in our lives C# Fm But when hope is gone Bbm B F# C# We will be there to help you rock the fuck on
[Outro]
B F# C#