Misc Unsigned Bands – Darby Ogill - Kissing Of The Sheriffs Wife (Guitar)

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Well me name it is Michael and I’ve lived in Dublin all me life

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My father was a farmer and me mother was the farmers wife

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They raised them up a family of girls to number twenty-one

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Of which I am the youngest and me blessed father’s only son

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Now living with so many girls ye’d think me hair’d be in curls

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Ye’d think I’d wear a scarf and have me earrings set with pretty pearls

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Oh, but I am a master of a man with manly passion

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And I always kiss the girls in a very manly fashion

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I wear a manly mustache and I drink me whiskey manly-like

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And all me friends’ll warn ye not to pick a row with “manly Mike”

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Last week I kissed the sheriffs’ wife; she kissed me back with little strife

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She swore it was the finest kiss she’d ever had in all her life

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But the sheriff saw the kissin’ and he swore upon his station

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He’d use his legal powers to change my situation

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He went to the magistrate and told him of my rampage

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When drunk, I fell upon his wife and took unfair advantage

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He swore that I had pulled a knife and put it to his pretty wife

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And charged her for a kiss or else I’d disengage her very life

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Aye, and other wrongful charges he drew up without true evidence

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And thus convinced the magistrate that I should pay a recompense

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Well I had to stand the trial because I refused to pay the fine

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I smiled when it turn out, the magistrate; he was a friend of mine

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Your honor, Mister Cassidy if you have the capacity

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I’ll give back the kiss I stole and thus prove my varassity

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Well the sheriff’s wife was willin’, and the sheriff had to curse and swear

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As I kissed the sheriff’s wife in the courtroom from the witness chair

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Well, Ma’am, says the magistrate, is that the kiss you lost before?

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Well, says she: I’m not quite sure; perhaps if I could try one more

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Then she kissed me without ration, a kiss of carnal passion

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‘Till all the girls were blushin’ and the sheriff’s teeth were gnashin’

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Araugh, proclaimed the magistrate, a clearer case I never saw

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For both of you are guilty of crimes not covered by the law

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To sentence you at all or to render a conviction

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As much as some might like it it’s not in my jurisdiction

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So I said to the gallery I’ll spend me next month’s salary

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To celebrate across the street in the tavern of O’Mallery

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Sure and anyone who comes they can help me drink away my sin

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And everyone’s invited. . . but do not let the sheriff in

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Well, we all rushed across the street in high anticipation

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To celebrate the famous justice of the Irish nation

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The word went round that drinks were free and people came from miles to see

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The farmer’s son who’d won the day and kissed his way to liberty

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Well by twos and by threes we all rushed into the drinkin’ hall

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Young men and old men and girls who were not men at all

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And we drank all the beer that me monthly wage would cover

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Then Michael Conway said that he would pay for yet another

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When that was finish, Ill be bound, each other man put up a pound

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And we drank until we couldn’t lift a glass to drink another round

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Then we all staggered home by the light upon the summer moon

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And no one that was there that night got out of bed ‘till after noon

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And that was the day I’ll remember fondly all me life

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The day that made me famous for the Kissin’ Of the Sheriff’s Wife