Misc Television – Puppet History - Prototype Instrument Song (Guitar)

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[Verse 1]

    C                           G
The mother of invention is both passion and intention

          F                                           G
And the plight can be rewarding, but it also can drag ass

    C                               F         G
And every grand creation's just the final iteration

     F            G             C
In a cavalcade of pitiful rough drafts

[Pre-chorus]

    C        A7
And so, it's me

       D7                   G
Failed instrument prototype 73

N.C. And I sound like... [Chorus]

         C                                E7
Well the most godawful racket that you'll ever hear

              Am                              D7
You'll wish a hungry pack of sewer rats would gnaw off your ears

    C                    E7
The drum go boom and the horn'll toot a toot

            Am                          D7           
But I sound like a cow with hemmorroids attempting to poop

    F7            G
Oh, baby, I sound bad

      C
Yes I do

[Verse 2]

       C                G               C              F
Well I still recall the day when Adolph took me out to play

            F                              G
And put his sweet wet Belgian lips upon my shiny little mouth

             C                      N.C.
And with his smoochers motorboatin' up against my special openin'

       F                G                C
What a dreadful horrid screeching I let out

[Pre-chorus]

    C        A7
And oh, the crowd

       D7                   G7
When they heard my wretched sound

N.C. How'd they take it? Oh... [Chorus]

  C                         E7
A fancy lady puked into her daughter's lap

   Am                                                D7          
...A priest screamed "Fucking Christ!" and threw his Bible in the trash

    C                       E7
The dogs all howled and the mice went SQUEAK!

Am                             D7              
Half the mezzanine ran out and laid down in the street

    F7            G
Oh, baby, I sound bad

      C
How 'bout that?

[Spoken]

        FM7
You know, after my first performance,

I was attacked by an angry mob who stuffed me in a sack with some stones

                          C
and tossed me in the river!

                                  Eb                                 Dm7
But I soon beckoned to some passersby like when those kids found Jumanji,

                                 C#M7
and so now I'm back to let the world

hear my fuckin' terrible noise. N.C. Check it out I'm horrible--(RANDOM NOTES) N.C. Wait wait wait--(MORE RANDOM NOTES) [Instrumental] FM7 Eb7 Dm7 G G7 [Chorus]

C                                       F#m
Well I clearly could've used some extra valves or a slide

          Am                                D7          G7
Well, too bad, I guess I'll just have to go eat shit and die

  C                       E7
A snare ra-ta-tats, and a gee-tar shreds

        Am                              D7          G7
But the noise that I emit will have you beggin' for death

F7        G
Baby, oooh

        C
I SOUND BAD!