Misc Television – Crazy Ex-Girlfriend - A Diagnosis (Guitar)

B                               Bsus2
For almost 30 years, I've known something was wrong

B
But Mom said weakness causes bloating, so I tried to be strong

E                                          F#
Fake it till you make it, that's how I got by

B                                          Bsus2       B
And when I tried to find the reason for my sadness and terror

B                      Bsus2     B
All the solutions were trial and error

E                                                  F#
Take this pill, say this chant, move here for this guy

    G#m         E       B     F#
But now there's no need for regret

       G#m       E  F#
'Cause I'm about to get

B
A diagnosis!

E
A diagnosis!

               G#m E
Don't tell me "No, sis-

                   F#
Ter, you don't fit in."

         B                  E
Doc, prescribe me my tribe, give me my throng

F#                      G#m
Tell me that this whole time I've belonged

           E                F#           B
With those other people who share my diagnosis

B
What could it be? What could be right?

B
Schizophrenic or bipolar lite?

E                                               F#
I've never heard voices, but maybe it's time to start

B
Obsessives with numbers, hoarders with cats

B
I could really rock a tinfoil hat

E                                                    F#
Perfect they're not, but at least they know who they are

G#m     E          B        F#
No more bad pills, fads, or tricks

G#m            E             F#
Who says there isn't an easy fix?

B
With a diagnosis!

             E
I'm ready to blow this

G#m                              E              F#
Joint, and by "joint," I mean my inner sense of confusion

      B                     E
I'm aware mental illness is stigmatized

        F#                    G#m
But the stigma is worth it if I've realized

E                F#                     B
Who I'm meant to be, armed with my diagnosis

D#m                                          E
Oh, the doctors that I've met who didn't get me!

         D#m                             E
This one naturopath used feathers to pet me

          C#m                       G#m
They said anxiety, insomnia were my affliction

    C#m                     G#m
The naturopath said it was sex addiction

    C#m                 B
But all those things I knew I wasn't

E                    F#
Yes, I like penises, but who doesn't?

   C#m                        B
So put me in a bottle, slap a label on

E                               F#
List out the side effects, then worries be gone

       C#m D#m E    F    F#
'Cause finally I'll know this

       B
My diagnosis!