Misc Musicals – Something Rotten - God I Hate Shakespeare (Guitar)

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[Verse]
B    E                        N.C.
  Oh God, I hate Shakespeare! *gasp* That’s right, I said it!

      B                            N.C.
No! I do! I hate Shakespeare! Why? I just don’t get it

      E        B            E             Am
How a mediocre actor from a measly little town

   B
Is suddenly the brightest jewel in England’s royal crown
[Verse 2]
   E
Oh God I hate Shakespeare his plays are wordy but

   B
Oh no! The “great” Shakespeare! That little turd

          E               B           E                  Am
He has no sense about the audience he makes them feel so dumb

    B
The bastard doesn’t care that my poor ass is getting numb
[Chorus]
G           D         E           D#
How can you say that? How can you say that?

     C           G                 A          D
It’s easy, I can say it cause it’s absolutely true!

G          D          E        D#
Don’t be a penis, the man is a genius!

    C              B              E
His genius is he’s fooling all of you!
[Interlude]
         E              A       F#             B
But he’s brilliant what majesty flows from his pen

    B7     C#m          A        B
His poetry soars like a sweet violin

      E        A           B              C#m
God’s own inspiration like lightning doth strike him

       A
And he captures my soul! Ah! Jeez, you sound just like him! Really? Thaaanks…
[Verse 3]
N.C.                          E     N.C.                                          B
You should hate Shakespeare! *gasp* Well no I don’t, I try to emulate Shakespeare!

N.C.                                 E              B                 E              Am
Well there’s your problem! You’re so blinded by the bard who’s such a pompous little man

B
Why is it a problem to admit that I’m a fan?

B
Cause he’s a hack with a knack for stealing anything he can!
[Chorus]
G           D         E           D#
How can you say that? How can you say that?

    C          G            A                D
The man really knows how to write a bitchin’ play!

G                  D        E               D#
You wish you could pen one, we wish we were in one

C                             B
I just wish that he would go away!

B
Well that’s not gonna happen, because everyone I know says

B
That he is the greatest writer that England has ever known!
[Verse 4]
N.C.                       E
And that’s ANOTHER thing I hate about Shakespeare!

                          B
Is all the twits who bloviate about Shakespeare!

N.C.                     E                B                   E           Am
And how they prattle on about his great accomplishments, well la-de-da-de-dah!

B
And once they start their gushing there’s no stopping them
[Verse 5]
                         E
And then it’s “blah blah blah blah blah Shakespeare!”

                              B
And he walks in, it’s “dum da dum ta da Shakespeare!”

                                 E
He’s holding court and they say “Will you’re such a genius and your writing is divine,

  B                         Em   E
A rose by any other name is such a clever line!”

                 E                   B                      E                 B
And they’re all “Ooh!” and he’s all “Stop” and they’re all “Yay” and I’m all “Ugh”

        B
And I’m REALLY getting sick of it!
[Verse 6]
                E
And oh, oh, oh, OH, I HATE SHAKESPEARE!

N.C.                      B                          N.C.
I think by now we sort of know you hate Shakespeare! Shmakespeare!

    E             B                 E          B
The way he feigns humility when all he does is gloat

    F                 C            F                 C
The way he wears that silly frilly collar ‘round his throat

    G                D                 G          D
The poster child for why no one should ever procreate

       G              D               G              D
Let me make a shorter list and I will give it to you straight:

D                                              G
Every little thing about Shakespeare is what I hate!

                                                    G
(He hates! He hates! He clearly surely really truly hates Shakespeare!)

            G
Don’t hate!