Misc Musicals – Commentary - Better Than Neil (Guitar)

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Better Than Neil Music by Jed Whedon Lyrics by Joss Whedon and Jed Whedon Performed by Nathan Fillion Backing Vocals by Maurissa Tancharoen Horn Arrangements by Maurissa Tancharoen [Intro]
Gm
Hey Ladies, Sit down, relax

Cm               Bb
I got a story to tell...
[Verse 1]
Cm
Every night I lie awake

Bb
With sorrow in my chest

Cm
I think of NPH and wonder

Bb
Is he getting rest?

Gm
Does he know each second

Cm
He’s only second best?

Eb
Tossing in his bed

F
What’s he wearing? Dread?
[Chorus]
Bb
I’m better

Gm
Better than Neil

F
In so many ways

Eb
It’s almost unreal

Bb
Oh sure he can sing

Gm
And piggies can squeal

F
It’s not a big deal

Eb
I’m better
[Verse 2]
Cm
So he was on Broadway

Bb
While I was on the soaps

Cm
Who’s got the high score

Bb
on "Ninja Ropes"

Gm
Who’s got a bullet-proof

Cm
Car like the Pope’s?

Eb
Look at Neil mackin’

F
So sad he’s so lackin’
[Verse 3]
Cm
He makes seven figures

Bb
And get Emmy nods

Cm
I make seven layer

     Bb
Bean dip of the gods

Gm
I’m also in Halo 3

Cm
What are the odds?

Eb
Now my ears are ringin’

F
‘Cause all the girls are singin’
[Chorus]
Bb
I’m better

Gm
Better than Neil

F
At so many things

Eb
It’s hard to conceal

Bb
Oh sure he does magic

Gm
Magic’s not real

F
How dumb do you feel?

Eb
I’m better
[Verse 4]
Cm
Neil played a kid doctor

Bb
Well, so did I, dude

Cm
But I was much younger

Bb
And totally nude

Gm
Neil kept that white coat on

Cm
Great Doctor Prude

Eb
Look there Felicia goes

F
Another deal you couldn’t close, yeah
[Verse 5]
Cm
I wink at a woman

Bb
She needs a drink - Stat!

Cm
She knows I get everything

Bb
I’m aiming at

Gm
Except for the Pope car

Cm
I lied about that

Eb
At least I’m not prone

F
To singing alone
[Bridge]
            Bb
Look at his smallness

               Gm
Compared to my tallness

             Cm
My porcelain doll-ness

              F
My port-in-a-squallness

               Bb
My kids-in-the-Hallness

                Gm
My Pink-Floyd’s "The Wall"-ness

                  Cm
My three parts of gaulness

                F
My just all-in-allness

                Bb
My wonderful me-ness

                F           Dm
My hammer - the people can tell

Eb               Dm
That I’m awfully swell

Eb                     Dm
While Neil has a weird smell

Eb               F
I’m just saying: Purell
[Chorus]
Bb
I’m better

Gm
Better than Neil

F
At - where do I start?

Eb
Romantic appeal

Bb
We both went for Penny

Gm
And who copped a feel?

F
The true man of steel

Eb
I’m better than Neil
[Chorus]
Bb
Yeah yeah yeah

Gm
I’m better than Neil

F
Just jumped off a moving

Eb
Automobile

Bb
He plays with his phone

Gm
While tires they squeal

F
It’s my scene to steal

Eb
I' m better than Neil
[Outtro]
Bb Gm F Eb  
Oo oo oo oo... improv, repeat until tired