Half Man Half Biscuit – Used To Be In Evil Gazebo (Guitar)

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Chords

 Esus4 E     Esus4 E    (repeat through monologue below)
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[Introduction]
Esus4 E     Esus4 E     Esus4 E     Esus4 E
I’m sitting in my Ladbroke Grove waiting for the NME;

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They’re coming down to interview me.

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But I haven’t told the others, ‘cos they’d mess about and burp, and tell the truth and laugh at me

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for drinking a classic red, bottled by a medal-winning estate on the banks of the Garonne.  
[Interview monologue]
Esus4 E     Esus4 E     Esus4 E     Esus4 E     Esus4 E     Esus4 E     Esus4 E     Esus4 E 
So then Ben, it seems every track on the EP involves death, drunkenness, desperate poverty, 

Esus4 E     Esus4 E      Esus4 E     Esus4 E      Esus4 E     Esus4 E      Esus4 E     Esus4 E
diabolical dealings, incest, murder and abandonment. Does this reflect your current state of mind?

Esus4 E     Esus4 E     Esus4 E     Esus4 E      Esus4 E     Esus4 E       Esus4 E     Esus4 E
Well, you know I have days. Those songs were written a few years back when I had a few problems 

Esus4 E     Esus4 E     Esus4 E     Esus4 E      Esus4 E     Esus4 E        Esus4 E     Esus4 E
with someone really close. Things started to weigh me down. And I generally don’t like to talk

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about it, you know.

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Okay, yeah – no problem.

Esus4 E     Esus4 E      Esus4 E     Esus4 E     Esus4 E     Esus4 E       Esus4 E     Esus4 E
What it is you see, is that you can love someone and hate them at the same time, and I felt like

Esus4 E     Esus4 E    Esus4 E     Esus4 E       Esus4 E     Esus4 E        Esus4 E     Esus4 E
I was on a tightrope – kind of like a precipice. It was all a bit deranged, and I guess that comes

Esus4 E     Esus4 E
through in the music.

Esus4 E     Esus4 E     Esus4 E     Esus4 E     Esus4 E     Esus4 E     Esus4 E     Esus4 E
Yeah, sure. Your guitarist used to be in Evil Gazebo. Has that been an influence on your sound

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Do you think?

Esus4 E     Esus4 E    Esus4 E     Esus4 E       Esus4 E     Esus4 E        Esus4 E     Esus4 E
Well those particular songs were more about the descent into madness which I found myself

Esus4 E     Esus4 E    Esus4 E     Esus4 E       Esus4 E     Esus4 E        Esus4 E     Esus4 E
falling into. So obviously I wrote those songs through nothing really to do with erm, this new

Esus4 E     Esus4 E    Esus4 E     Esus4 E       Esus4 E     Esus4 E        Esus4 E     Esus4 E
guitarist, and er, it’s all to do with the ensuing psychiatric help. Which I suppose is in evidence

Esus4 E     Esus4 E    Esus4 E     Esus4 E       Esus4 E     Esus4 E        
within the lyrics. As I say, I don’t want to go into that too much.

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Right, yeah. Your ex-girlfriend informs us, erm, after her new band of course – Pankhurst, entered

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the charts last week, that your treatment as such was at a voluntary day ward and you went along

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there purely to get people into thinking you were the new Nick Drake.
[Chorus]
     E                 A              E                A
I’ve been in a mental  hospital, I’ve been in a mental hospital

      E             A             E        B7
But I don’t like to talk about it, all the same.

     E                 A              E                A
I’ve been in a mental  hospital, I’ve been in a mental hospital

     E                 A
I’ve been in a mental  hospital, I’ve been in a mental hospital.

Esus4 E     Esus4 E   (repeat for whole monologue below)
|  |  |  |/ |  |  |  |
[Monologue]
Esus4 E     Esus4 E    Esus4 E     Esus4 E       Esus4 E     Esus4 E        Esus4 E     Esus4 E
I looked at the colour booklet they gave me in town; there was a picture of a young boy

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on the cover playing table tennis with a big friendly bear. An owl was umpiring and in the

Esus4 E     Esus4 E    Esus4 E     Esus4 E       Esus4 E     Esus4 E        Esus4 E     
background The Tindersticks were opening the Hamilton Bland Memorial Swimming Pool.

Esus4 E     Esus4 E    Esus4 E     Esus4 E       Esus4 E     Esus4 E        Esus4 E     
Behind an ancient oak, a figure stood with his head hung down in shame like an actress

Esus4 E     Esus4 E    Esus4 E     Esus4 E       Esus4 E     Esus4 E        Esus4 E     
leaving a divorce court. He’d been found guilty of wearing a Brazilian shirt with a number

Esus4 E     Esus4 E    Esus4 E     Esus4 E       Esus4 E     Esus4 E        Esus4 E     Esus4 E
ten on the back and swigging from a bottle of lager, whilst talking of the beautiful game. 
[Bridge]
                                                                    Esus4 E
Up on the beacon a balladeer with a big nose belted out a broadside.
[Chorus]
   A      E           A            E      A    E     Esus4  E
Suspected murderer of Tupac murder suspect murdered.

   A      E           A            E      A    E     Esus4  E
Suspected murderer of Tupac murder suspect murdered.

   A      E           A            E      A    E     Esus4  E
Suspected murderer of Tupac murder suspect murdered.

A    E     Esus4  E
 Murdered. 

A    E     Esus4  E  (x5)  E  
 Murdered.