Half Man Half Biscuit – Lord Herefords Knob (Ukulele)

   E                           B                 E
As I camped out one evening to take the midnight air

                               A              B
I heard a maiden grieving from somewhere over there

    A             E             A                E
Who is it you are mourning; for whom do you wear grey?

    A               E          F#                B7
She said I pine for no one - I just can't pay my way.

     A                    E         B            E
Ever since the chattering classes invaded Hebden Bridge

    A                   E                  F#                  B
And priced the likes of me and mine to the pots of the Pennine Ridge

   A                      E                  A             E
To South East Wales I was forced to flee and now I have no job

                       A          B7                     E
That's why tonight I'm sitting on top of Lord Hereford's Knob.

                              B                E
For you I'd waive expenses to try and help you out

                               A              B
For your beauty influences the landscape hereabouts

     A                  E               A                   E
Look up my betrothed at Three Cocks; be sure she'll see you right

      A          E             F#                B7
While I go up to Yorkshire and there avenge your plight.

     A                      E                 B                     E
Soon reports were filtering through to me the pair were drowning in bliss

  A                   E            F#                B
I can't recall having ever been cuckolded quite like this

  A              E                  A
I gave up hope ironically for Lent,

     E                  A         B7                   E
Come see me living in a bivvie if you're ever up Pen-Y-Ghent.

                              B             E
Although upon reflection I've been a trifle green

                                A                 B
I still think with affection on everything that's been

      A                E        A                     E
So prepare that fatted calf and string up the bunting gay

     A               E            F#            B7
Your brisk and bonny ploughboy is coming home today.

      E                         B                      E     B7
And tonight he'll be sitting on top of Lord Hereford's Knob.

  E                         B                      E     B7
Tonight he'll be sitting on top of Lord Hereford's Knob.

   E                       B
On touching the trig point I found my thrill

       E                               B
To the east Brokeback Mountain, to the west Benny Hill

     E                           B
I'll give you the grid ref - you might like to go:

E    B
SO2 24350.

E                           B     
Could this be heaven, would that be the Severn?

E                      B
Twampa, Twampa, you're gonna need a jumper,

   E                    B                      E      B7
It gets a bit chilly on top of Lord Hereford's Knob.

  E                         B                      E
Tonight he'll be sitting on top of Lord Hereford's Knob.

B7                         E
All of our songs sound the same;

                            B7                     E
Tonight he'll be sitting on top of Lord Hereford's Knob.

    B7                    E
I'm keeping two chevrons apart;

                            B7                     E
Tonight he'll be sitting on top of Lord Hereford's Knob.

           B7                  E
You're the reason why paradise lost;

                            B7                     E
Tonight he'll be sitting on top of Lord Hereford's Knob.