Half Man Half Biscuit – Arthurs Farm (Guitar)

B                G#m                        E                  F#
Arthur Askey and Douggie-Wouggie Bader went down to the animal farm

B                             G#m
Douggie bored a boar with his stories from the war

      E                             F#
And explained about the boil on his palm.

  B                         G#m
Napoleon, very pink offered both of them a drink

      E                       F#
And a drink and a drink and a drink.

B                               G#m
Come the hour of four they were legless to be sure

    E                          F#7
Not one of them had even had a wink of sleep.

    B                 E            F#
And everybody sang as loud as they could

B                 E         F#
'Two legs bad but four legs good'

B                       E        F#       B G#m E F# (x2)
This made the boys feel pretty oppressed.

B                         G#m
Came the new realm it was A A at the helm

      E                                  F#
While Douggers played 'Luftwaffe' on the roofs.

      B                        G#m
After amputating limbs all the others wrote new hymns

      E                          F#
And a signpost said 'Second Hand Hooves'.

B                       G#m
Years passed by, double grazing in the sty

       E                        F#
It was good but it was total apathy.

     B                           G#m
Everybody arsed around and that 'beasts of England' sound

         E                      F#7
Had been ruined by a busy, busy bee.

    B                          E           F#
And chants were heard from the East to the West

B                   E       F#
'Four legs good but no legs best'

B          E         F#7    B  F#7
Invalidity reigned supreme.

    B                          E           F#
And chants were heard from the East to the West

B                   E       F#
'Four legs good but no legs best'

B                      E         F#    B G#m E F# (x4) F#7
One time visitors were now the regime.