Bobby Bare – The Devil And Billy Markham (Ukulele)

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The Devil walked into Linebaugh's

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on a rainy Nashville night

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While the lost souls sat and sipped their soup

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in the sickly neon light.

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then got down on his knees.

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He says, "Is there one among you scum

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who'll roll the dice with me?"

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Well, Red, he just strums his guitar,

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pretending not to hear.

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And Eddie, he just looks away

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and sips on his beer.

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I've had my share of Hell"

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And kept scribbling on a napkin,

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some songs he thought would sell.

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Ronnie just kept whisperin' low

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to the snuff queen clutching his sleeve,

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And somebody coughed, and the Devil scoffed,

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and turned on his heels to leave.

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"'fore you walk out that door.

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If you're lookin' for some action, friend,

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well, I've rolled them dice before."

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And there stood Billy Markham,

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he's been on the scene for years,

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Singin' all them raunchy songs that the town

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didn't want to hear.

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and his eyes were wise and sad,

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All his songs were the songs of the street,

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and all his luck was bad.

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"I know you," says Billy Markham,

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"from many a dark and funky place,

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But you always spoke in a different voice

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and wore a different face.

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with hustlers and with whores,

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And, Hell, I ain't afraid to roll

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them devilish dice of yours."

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"Well, then, get down," says the Devil,

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"just as if you was gonna pray,

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And take these dice in your luckless hand

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and I'll tell you how this game is played.

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and if you roll thirteen you win,

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And all the joys of flesh and gold

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are yours to touch and spend.

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But if that thirteen don't come up,

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then you can kiss your ass goodbye

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And will your useless bones to God,

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'cause your goddamn soul is mine!"

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"Hell, I've played in tougher games.

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I've loved ambitious women

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and I've rode on wheelless trains.

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So gimme room, you stinkin' fiend,

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and let it all unwind.

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Nobody's ever rolled a thirteen yet,

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but this just might be the time."

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and the dice feels heavy as stones.

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"They should, they should," the Devil says,

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"'cause they're carved from Jesus' bones."

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And Billy Markham he turns the dice

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and the dice, they have no spots.

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"I'm sorry," says the Devil,

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"but they're the only dice I got."

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"Now, I really don't mean to bitch,

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But I never thought I'd stake my roll

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in a sucker's game like this."

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"Well, then, walk off," says the Devil.

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"Nobody's tied you down."

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"Walk off where?" says Billy Markham.

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"It's the only game in town.

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that if I should chance to lose,

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I will my guitar to some would-be star

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who'll play some honest blues,

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Who ain't afraid to sing the words

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like damn or shit or fuck

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And who ain't afraid to put his ass on the stage

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where he makes his bucks.

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and sings some sugary lies,

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I'll haunt him till we meet in Hell,

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now, gimme them fuckin' dice."

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And Billy Markham shakes the dice

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and yells, "Come on, thirteen!"

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And the dice, they roll - and they come up blank.

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"You lose!" the Devil screams.

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that I really like your style.

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Of all the fools I've played and beat,

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you're the first one who lost with a smile."

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"Well, I'll tell you somethin'," Billy Markham says.

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"Those odds weren't too damn bad.

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In fourteen years on Music Row,

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that's the best damn chance I've had."

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and the Devil walk out through Linebaugh's door,

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Leavin' Billy's old beat-up guitar

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there on the floor.

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And if you go into Linebaugh's now,

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you can see it there today

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Hangin' from a nail

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on the wall of peelin' gray

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It's Billy Markham's old guitar

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That nobody dares to play.