Bo Burnham – Cant Handle This (Guitar)
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Can't Handle This (Kanye Rant) by Bo Burnham
Finale of his comedy special "Make Happy".
A Chords are optional.
[Intro]
D F#m/C# Bm G x2
D Can I say my shit? F#m/C# New York, Can I say my shit? Bm I've got lots of shit to say G I've got lots of shit to say (Ooh)
(Spoken)
D I can't fit my hand inside a Pringle can. I have a huge amount of trouble F#m/C# Fitting my hand inside of a Pringle can, I can get my hand like four inches into the can Bm But then I have to tilt the can into my mouth Bm But then a bunch of crumbs have accumulated at the bottom of the can G So they all go spilling onto my face D What I'm trying to say is the diameter of Pringle cans is way too small D I'll say it again F#m/C# The diameter of Pringle cans is way too small. Two radiuses of a Pringle can is way too small Bm If you feel me, put your hands up Come on! Bm If you feel me, put your hands up G Look at all these hands that are way too big to fit inside of Pringle cans D Your hands are too big to fit inside a Pringle can. Your hands are too big to fit inside a Pringle can F#m/C# You think you can, I know you can't, you think you can
(Spoken)
F#m/C# Pringles! Bm Listen to the people, I am sure ninety percent of the complaint letters you get Bm Are about the width of your cans G Just make them wider. I've overdone the Pringles thing, sorry D I want to have a daughter D Want to have a daughter
(Spoken)
F#m/C# So I can finally have someone around the house who can fit their hands in the Pringle can Bm Yes, I'm still on the Pringle cans thing! Yeah! I'll move on, alright? G But that is priority número uno D I don't go to the gym because I'm self-conscious about my body F#m/C# But I'm self-conscious about my body cause I don't go to the gym Bm Irony can be so painful G That's a Catch-22 (Ooh!) Let's do this! D I went to Chipotle D When at Chipotle F#m/C# Got myself a chicken burrito
(Spoken)
Bm I went down the line and I got all these ingredients and at the end of the line G The guy tried to wrap the burrito, but half of the shit inside the burrito spilled out G He still wrapped it G I was like, dude you should have warned me! D You're a burrito expert You should have told me halfway through! F#m/C# "Hey, man. You might be reaching maximum burrito capacity here" F#m/C# Do you think I want a messy burrito? F#m/C# No one wants a messy burrito Bm The whole appeal of the burrito is that all of the ingredients are contained Bm Within the confines of the tortilla G I wouldn't have gotten half of the shit if I knew it wasn't gonna fit in the burrito! Alright? Look D I wouldn't have got the lettuce if I knew it wouldn't fit D I wouldn't have got the cheese if I knew it wouldn't fit F#m/C# I wouldn't have got the peppers if I knew it wouldn't fit F#m/C# I wouldn't have got - Half of it Bm Like, I'm okay with small mistakes G If you've got no more chicken, I'll take pork A D But I'll blow my dad before I eat a burrito with a fork D I wouldn't have got the lettuce if I knew it wouldn't fit F#m/C# I wouldn't have got the cheese if I knew it wouldn't fit F#m/C# I wouldn't have got the peppers if I knew they wouldn't fit. Man, I wouldn't have got half of it, like Bm Half of it, like Bm Half of it, like Bm Half of it, like Bm G Half of it right now G I think it's time I G Think it's time, I think that we break it down
[Short Interlude]
D F#m/C# Bm G
(Spoken)
D I can sit here and pretend like my biggest problems are F#m/C# Pringle cans, and burritos Bm The truth is, my biggest problem's you Bm I want to please you Bm But I want to stay true to myself G I want to give you the night out that you deserve G But I want to say what I think G And not care what you think about it D Part of me loves you D Part of me hates you F#m/C# Part of me needs you F#m/C# Part of me fears you Bm And I don't think that I can handle this right now Bm G Handle this right now G I don't think that I can handle this right now D I don't think that I can handle this right now D I don't think that I can handle this right now F#m/C# I don't think that I can handle this right now F#m/C# Look at them, they're just staring at me Bm G Like, "come and watch the skinny kid with a steadily declining mental health G And laugh as he attempts A D To give you what he cannot give himself D I don't think that I can handle this right now D I don't think that I can handle this right now F#m/C# They don't even know the half of this right now F#m/C# They don't even know the half of it Bm But I know I'm not a doctor G I'm a pussy, I put on a silly show A So I should probably just shut up and do my job D So here I go D I wouldn't have got the lettuce if I knew it wouldn't fit F#m/C# I wouldn't have got the cheese if I knew it wouldn't fit F#m/C# I wouldn't have got the peppers if I knew they wouldn't fit F#m/C# I wouldn't have got half Bm You can tell them anything if Bm G You just make it funny, make it rhyme G And if they still don't understand you G D Then you run it one more time D I don't think that I can handle this right now (Haa!) F#m/C# Handle this right (Hoo!) F#m/C# Handle this right Bm You don't even know the half of this right now Bm Right now (Haa!) G Handle this right now G Handle this right G D Handle this right now
N.C
Thank you, good night!
N.C
I hope you're happy